the only living boy in las vegas

where have you been?

2006-08-18T09:16:00.000-07:00

Yes, yes. It has been a long time. But I'm starting to notice a trend. I think...I THINK people are seeing the Virgin Mary in odd places. ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? Here we go again. This time she's chocolate! Dark Chocolate. You're thinking the same thing I am. Is it sacrilegious to pray to a chocolate bunny? "Then God spoke all these words... You shall not make for yourself an idol, whether in the form of anything that is in heaven above, or that is on the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth, or out of chocolate, even if it's dark."

genius baby crap

2006-04-02T19:52:00.000-07:00

As far as the NCAA tournament goes, I guess I don't know as much as I thought.

Now reader (or more like viewer) beware. This has a been a private Miles family secret for a long time, but it's time to go public. Luke, my oldest son, is a genius. When he was just weeks old - he's now almost three years - he once crapped a map of the (continental of course) Unites States. This picture is not doctered in ANY way. I swear on Charlie Chaplin's grave.

I'll bet Einstein never crapped Germany in 1879.

beware the ides of march

2006-03-16T20:00:00.000-08:00

Don't get me wrong, I love baseball as much as the next guy. Maybe more. But just before the crack of the bat rings out, and the smell of the park wafts through, it's the din of college students screaming "AIR BAAAAALLL," and the wailing of the pep band. That's right, it's March Madness, baby! I'm all over the big dance. I can't get enough. I don't know a lot about college hoops, but I do know that Tom Izzo and Jim Boeheim are always strong in the post season. Coach K is tough and this could be JJ Redick's year. Stay tuned...

Kids are great. Proof follows...

welcome home

2006-02-09T19:13:00.000-08:00

Carter Steven is home.

The long and short of it is as follows...

Monday morning (2/6/07) Jess started feeling some random and inconsistent labor pains. By about noon I was home from work, and the labor was becoming more consistent. about 8 to 10 minutes apart, lasting about 50 seconds. We ate lunch (Jack in the Box!), and the contractions progressed regularly. By about 6 o'clock they were about 5 minutes apart, and getting a little more painful. Somewhere around 7:15pm Jessie got very serious, and we knew it was time to head to the hospital. Upon initial check in Jess was dilated to about 5 or 6cm. the triage nurse asked us if we were having a boy or a girl, to which we of coarse replied that we didn't know. She also asked us about our names that we were thinking about, to which we also replied we didn't know. Girl names we had, but boys - not so much. Nurse Bev told us her grandsons' names, one of which was Carter Joseph. I guess eventually it stuck with us. The hospital was very busy - we got the last labor and delivery room - which worked to our advantage, because they retty much just left us alone to labor. By about 11:00pm Jess was at about 8cm, but her bag of waters had not yet broken. The nurse called the Docter, and he said if we broke the water, we'd pretty much have the baby right there. So he came to the hospital about midnight, broke Jessie's water, and young Carter was born at 12:20am. ON HIS DUE DATE! 2/7/06. 7 lbs. 8 oz., 19 inches. Jess did it all natural, not a bit of medication. She's a machine! Baby and Mommy and Luke and Daddy are doing well. Resting and bonding at home.

Love to you all. More to come later.

boogers and virgins

2006-01-09T21:14:00.000-08:00

Note to self: Would you blog please. Just once, for crying out loud.

My son is growing up, literally, before my very eyes. And if you know me, you know (or maybe you don't) that one of my biggest pet peeves is when people incorrectly use the word, "literally." Like, "I was literally freezing." Or, "I literally weigh, like, a thousand pounds." ridiculous. But that's another blog for another time. Two days ago he started sleeping in a "big boy bed." No, Eric, this is not a reference to how you looked in high school. He (my son) loves it. And for the first time, yesterday, he peed in the potty. Big step. It'd be great to only have one baby in diapers at a time. Speaking of, new baby Miles has about 4 weeks left to brew, then hello world. Jessie is tired, and beautiful, and nervous, and excited. All is well.

Even super heroes need a little nose pick every once in a while.

Do yourself a favor and go to www.pandora.com. Right now you could be in charge. Great online music player that lets you design your own radio stations. Easy registration. Free, if you can put up with a few ads. Go. I'm a believer.

The Virgin Mother is at it again. This time in Miami on a Backboard. The need for people to believe is strong. Dangerous even. God doesn't need a backboard. It's all net. Have you ever played around the world with God? He can literally shoot it around the world. Literally.

brief note

2005-12-17T10:10:00.000-08:00

I love Christmas cookies.

it's a miracle

2005-11-29T22:13:00.000-08:00

Build.

I've caught the bug. I've really started to getting serious about carpentry. My father planted the seed long ago, and I've always loved to build, but I'm really starting to learn. From failures and mistakes. By doing things the hard way, then discovering there's an easier way. Or a better tool. I've added a couple pics of my two latest projects. The stool is a gift. The easel for me. More projects, and in turn more art, to come.

Build.

So Mary is weeping blood. Again. Or so they say at a church (building) in Sacramento, CA. The truth is I'm a self labeled skeptic, but this time I'm not really sure if it matters to me whether or not it's true. You can decide that for yourself. The part of the story that truly makes me sad is the fact that, and I quote (which you can tell by the quotation marks), "They say most of [the blood] was smudged off by souvenir hunters..." Watch out for it on eBay. If this time it truly is a miracle, do you think that God is somewhere saying to Moses & the woman at the well & Ray Charles, "See, I told you guys. It happens every time. Every time I send a miracle to the world someone has to make a profit off of my work. Look what happened to duct tape, and Marilyn Monroe. Here we go again..." Just two of God's many miracles.

Build.

the wedding

2005-11-19T22:44:00.000-08:00

I've been to the top of the mountain. And it is good.

How many of you can say you've been to a Klingon wedding? Now I can. So can Jess. We just came back from Valley of Fire, where we attended an honest to goodness Klingon wedding ceremony. Who the guilty parties are and from where I know them is beside the point. IT WAS A KLINGON WEDDING! I truly have never been to anything remotely like it. Costumes, fighting, bad acting, cold pizza; it was the real deal. I don't know that describing it could do it justice, so I've posted a picture.

Congratulations David and Suzanne.

And thank you. tlho' SoH

El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora La Reina de los Angeles de Porciuncula

2005-11-13T21:08:00.000-08:00

Back from the weekend in Los Angeles. The city of angels. The city of angles. The city of models. Swimmin' pools, movie stars, palm trees, everlasting sun, everlasting sushi, sea, sand, surf, actorswriterssingersdancers, the unemployment line, actors who pretend to be governor, governors who pretend to be actors, the Socialist Republic of Santa Monica, Ed Harris, Andy McDowell, over-priced gasoline, SUVs, smog, traffic, stripmall hell, breast implants, chin implants, butt implants, hair transplants, traffic, earthquakes, traffic, traffic, No Parking Anytime Except on Sunday, and some of the best friends I've ever had on this, or any other planet.

My Dad is a Vet. Friday was his day. He's proud. I am too.

pirate's booty

2005-11-09T22:42:00.000-08:00

Update. Because I know you've all been wondering, "how'd they do it?" It seems that the Seaborn Spirit, part of Carnival Cruise Line, was armed with a sonic weapon that caused the pirates to flee. Who knew Kathy Lee Gifford was so tough!?

What's in a name?

2005-11-07T22:07:00.000-08:00

This is only my second week now and I've been labeled a "Hobo Blogger." Apparently a Hobo Blogger is one who only blogs every once in a while. Kinda comes and goes, if you will. Sorry DC, I think that makes you a Hobo as well. My friend, Randi (you can read one of her 27 or so blogs here - randi m) says one of her friends coined the phrase, and since I'm deathly afraid of being labeled something, I'm gonna do my best to stay current. And which is it that makes me a Yuppie, now, blogging or working on a car? Wow, I'm certainly deathly afraid of being a yuppie. This could be an issue.

Question. When does being "particular" about how you like things turn into Obsessive Compulsive Disorder? Like the way you eat. This came up at work today. When I eat something with sugar on the outside, like say a sugar cookie or some other tasty treat, I prefer, or rather I need to eat it with the sugar side down so that the sweetness of the sugar hits my tongue before it gets mixed up in the rest of the bite. Am I the only one here? And no, Eric, that's not the same as eating all of the topping off your pizza with a fork, then eating the saucy crust. That's just weird.

Pirates attacked a cruise ship off the coast of Somalia today. I'm sure there are all kinds of lessons to be learned here, the least of which maybe that there are actually still pirates sailing the seven seas. But let me just give a little word of advice. If your gonna go on a cruise, don't do it off the coast of Somalia.

I'm taking bets/suggestions on what to name the coming Miles child. Boy and girl names welcome.

Blogs away...

2005-11-02T23:01:00.000-08:00

So I'm now blogging. I feel like a quote out of context.

This past weekend I ventured for the first time on my own into the world of non-routine automotive maintenance. I've changed oil. I've changed filters. I've changed tires. But this weekend power steerings were dis- and re-mantled, v-belts were replaced, and manifolds were... unfolded. I felt like Tom Hanks in Castaway when he finally gets the fire going. Like the first caveguy who came back to the, well, cave and said, "...I call it the WHEEL!" New brakes are soon to follow. Jess said the grease was sexy. It was.

Self discovery. My Mom was right. Again. I'm pretty sure she once (or 73 times) told me I would regret quitting piano lessons, and here I am, regretting having quit piano lessons. I do bang out a few chords from time to time here at the Carder Ranch & Lounge, and most of the time my playing sounds eerily like my father's. For the record though, Mom, I don't regret not learning to play the trumpet.